As individuals, we sometimes feel that we have not done anything wrong. Yet the other person believes that some injustice has been done to him. If the other perceives us as the cause for their pain or suffering, it is wise for us to ask for their forgiveness.
Even when we sneeze, without our knowledge, we’re killing many germs. Even when we walk, or talk or do something else – any action has some flaws. Any of our actions could have hurt someone. Therefore, if without our knowledge, our actions have hurt someone, we should not hesitate to ask for forgiveness. Knowingly or unknowingly, intentionally or unintentionally, if you have hurt someone by your thoughts, words, or deeds – you ask that they forgive you.
Neither forgiving, nor asking forgiveness, will make one’s social status go down. In fact, it shows one’s strength. You are taking responsibility for clearing up some conflict that has happened in the past, and bringing harmony in its place. The respect that you gain by your compassion, by your broadmindedness, cannot be lost.
Today, there is so much hatred, tension and violence in the world. There is domestic violence at home. Violence between communities. Conflicts between countries. If everyone in the world could practice forgiveness – both asking and giving – many of the world’s conflicts could be solved. Many of the conflicts in families, and in relationships, would be solved.
We don’t plan our own mistakes. Most of them stem from a lack of awareness. If you do not plan your mistakes, what makes you think that the other person plans their mistakes?
All mistakes are made out of either a lack of awareness or ignorance. When we do not have compassion for someone when they make a mistake and do not forgive them, then we will seek revenge. We then become bound to a cycle of negative feelings. Our mind and spirit turn to rage and violence.
Have compassion for those who have hurt you. When you think of forgiving, you normally think of someone as a culprit and you see an intention behind the culprit’s mistake. When you are compassionate, you recognise the ignorance behind the person’s mistake.
Compassion is even better than forgiveness. In forgiveness, you see an intention behind a mistake. In compassion, however, you go a step further and look into the person’s heart, beyond their words, beyond their behavior. You see the wound in the person that caused them to make their mistakes. When there is a wound inside individuals, they will try to share it with other people.
